How to learn to not care about the judgment of others

How to learn to not care about the judgment of others? If you are reading this post too it is because, very likely, you too belong to that 99% of the world population who lives by paying attention to the judgment of others. I, among the greatest human fortunes I have, have that of having become completely independent over time and for this reason I feel I can give some advice to those who perhaps would need to get out of this position dominated by others, to whom they say, what they think. How to learn to be independent of it? Follow my 5 golden rules.

Know who you are and what you want.

I put it as a second point but in reality it could have been the first. Each of us is an entity of being, or what he really is, and of wanting, or what he wants from life. I have voluntarily excluded having because in my opinion it is not what we have that determines our size. But what we are and what we want. Well these two entities should be the only judges according to which to write the path of our life, of our personal, emotional and working choices. Cultivating what we were born for. But we must first know who we really are and what we want. In this path it may be useful to contact a mental coach or a psychotherapist. I assure you it’s worth it. Once you have a clear idea of ​​who you really are and what you really want (and not what the world requires of you), your existence will change for the better and will definitely be downhill even in the face of the most dramatic life choices.

100 Best I Don't Care Quotes On Being Judged | BrilliantRead Media

Run after your happiness: it is a duty

The American Constitution speaks of the right to happiness. I’m not quite sure honestly, that we can talk about law. What I am sure of instead is the pursuit of personal happiness is an absolute duty of each of us. From when we get up in the morning to when we go to sleep in the evening, our day should be articulated according to this single goal. Understanding what makes us really happy (difficult part), and using it (not easy, but not impossible). If we were ever to enter into this perspective of ideas, the judgment of others would become a breeze not even able to move our hair. Malice, judgments, envy would have the specific weight of the air: because we no longer have the time to give them weight, we have a duty, we must resort to happiness. We all have limited time on this piece of the world, limited and not known a priori. There is therefore no time to waste in the pursuit of happiness by staying behind the judgments of others. Open the umbrella of your courage and start your search now.

The positive judgment of others made you feel good.

The first question you should ask yourself is, looking back on your whole life: every time you heard and above all followed the judgment of others, did it make you feel good? Now, there are no universally recognized statistics with respect to this question of mine but if I have to rely on my experience and those of the people I have known I would say that the answer is no. Keeping up with the judgment of others, perhaps indulging it almost never makes the person feel better. Will he already want to say something? Keep that in mind.

If you are looking for perfection, know that you are making fun of yourself

I know many people who fear the judgment of others because they belong to the ranks of absolute perfectionists. Oh all of you who belong to this group listen to the judgment of your Roberto Maggio: surrender, no ifs and buts. If you continue to pursue a life made of perfection, be it physical, stylistic, economic or moral, know that your existence is only one and is already predictable today; at some point you will realize that your time on this world is coming to an end, the chimera of perfection never revealed itself in your existences. Not even for a moment in passing. Hold tight my dear, life is imperfect. Get over it, gloss over the discounted judgments of others who point it out to you and move on.

Learn to “read the judgments” of others

People’s judgments can be agglomerated in these interpretative sets: if they are positive they are either false or filled with envy, so there is no need to give them too much weight. If, on the other hand, they are negative then they can be both objective and therefore to be taken into consideration, according to your schemes, and filled with envy (and therefore to be discarded). The skill therefore lies in discerning negative judgments. But it is a gift that can be learned over time and with experience.

“I judge people based on their principles, not mine. “

MARTIN LUTHER KING