The borderline personality disorder
This is a photography blog but, over time, it has increasingly transformed into a personal blog in the strictest sense of the term, an open place where you can express thoughts and feelings that dominate me at a certain moment with the aim of share them with those who have the time and desire to read them. It is a bit like lying down on the psychologist’s couch and starting to bring out one’s own dramas or joys in some cases, but with the difference that the outburst does not happen in front of a real person but in front of an imaginary audience, but not therefore less involved. In fact, the basic idea is that it is almost always possible to find in the lives of others what is happening to us and that, at times, it gives us the feeling of being a “unicum” on a universal level.
On this basis, today I want to talk to you about a psychological disorder that is now very widespread today, we are even talking about almost 5% of the world population, which in some way has become part of my life. In fact, it happens that sometimes it puts you in front of an illness or a malaise, as you prefer, even when it is not you who are experiencing it firsthand but it is perhaps someone close to you who is experiencing it. These are situations in which, in some ways, you too end up getting sick or experiencing that disorder in some way. Almost as if the problems of the psyche are somehow viral, like a cold or herpes. In fact, there is some similarity with these infections, namely that, a bit like the aforementioned herpes and colds, we tend to “get infected” with ailments of the person starting with the people closest to us.
Well, the disorder I want to write to you about today is borderline personality disorder: it is a disorder that obviously affects mental health and affects the way a person thinks and feels about himself and others. It therefore includes self-image problems, difficulty managing emotions and behavior, and an unstable relationship pattern.
Symptoms of borderline personality disorder
According to the categorizations made by doctors and psychologists, we speak of borderline personality disorder when five or more of these symptoms / manifestations coexist:
1) An intense fear of abandonment, real or imagined
2) A pattern of intense and unstable relationships, such as idealizing someone for a moment and then suddenly believing that the person doesn’t care enough
3) Changes in self-identity and self-image
4) Periods of stress and loss of contact with reality, from a few minutes to a few hours
5) Impulsive and risky behaviors such as bingeing or drug abuse, or even sabotaging one’s success by suddenly quitting a good job or ending a positive relationship
6) Threats or suicidal behavior or self-harm
7) Mood swings that last from a few hours to a few days
8) Feelings of emptiness
9) Inappropriate and intense anger
10) Tendency to assume sexually promiscuous habits and attitudes
Causes of borderline personality disorder
To date, researchers aren’t sure exactly what causes borderline personality disorder, but studies suggest that genetic, environmental, and social factors can increase the risk of developing it such as:
• Family history
• Structure and function of the brain
• Environmental, cultural and social factors.
Is borderline personality disorder treatable?
Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) can be treated. Many people with BPD manage the condition and lead fulfilling lives. But effective treatment takes time, patience, and effort.
Many types of psychotherapy can help you manage BPD such as dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) or cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT). Through several sessions you learn to manage emotions, recognize and modify unwanted behaviors and acquire a new perspective.
It may also be necessary to take drugs to treat the symptoms of BPD. Medicines can help with anxiety and depression, regulate mood swings, or help you control impulsive behavior. Antipsychotic medications help some people with BPD.
Bad news and good news
The bad news is that there is no way to prevent borderline personality disorder (BPD). BPD is often inherited (passed on through families). The good is that more often than not, the symptoms of borderline personality disorder gradually subside with age. Some people’s symptoms go away in their 40s.
How to deal with a person with borderline personality disorder
There are guidelines to deal with such as to impose limits, to take threats seriously, to improve communication and, most importantly, to take care of yourself because you will be subjected to extreme stress over time. . And it is here, on this precise point that, from my point of view, every possible theory on borderline personality disorders falls and the practice begins, the one on which there is no book that can help you.
Because if on the one hand there are the advice and rules that, rightly, doctors and psychologists offer to those who live near (or at least try) to a person with borderline personality disorder, on the other then there are the feelings that they always complicate everything and, if we want to use a photographic metaphor, they prevent us from focusing on the problem.
In fact, there is a strong burden of suffering combined with an incredible feeling of helplessness in seeing a loved one suffer from these disorders and it often happens that we ourselves, although theoretically healthy, are not completely able to understand the disease and its evolutions. and we end up blaming ourselves, for example, for having given little love or little attention to the borderline person.
Not so obviously. The fact is that the disease makes things tremendously complicated and the alternation between phases of lucidity and phases of total instability increases the sense of frustration because, just when we think we have reached a balance with the sick person, we see them again slip away into their demons, and we there, unable to understand and help.
The truth is that in the face of these problems the main effort that those who live close to these people should make is to fully accept the situation. There is no other way, and from there to work patiently, sometimes staying close to them, other times staying away from them, taking care that they do not hurt themselves, that they follow the treatments and waiting for, as the researchers say, time to dry up slowly. slowly symptoms.
If we have had the strength and patience to wait, we will see them reborn one day, almost as if they had come out of a long process of exorcism which will surely have left wounds inside and out but which, hopefully, will have brought a person back to life. It is not easy, some days it is fucking difficult but if you really care about that person that you do not imagine your life differently than with her / him, with all the problems that this entails, I think, it is worth it.
“Nobody queues for a flat roller coaster”